Monthly Archives: September 2021

Back from the break

Tweet: Sorry for not keeping in touch, I have literally nothing to say.

I’m back blogging

I’m not sure what else to say here. The time off helped.

I’m not completely refreshed about writing/blogging. Not having to do it for 3 weeks was necessary. I’m really hard on myself whenever I mess up. A recovering perfectionist.

I really needed that break. It forced me to do other fulfilling activities such as cooking instead. My brain needed a rest.

I dunno how often I’ll be putting out posts… For now all I know is that I’m back to a regular schedule. I need deadlines and routines to function. I’m finally feeling comfortable at work, and am starting to notice some headspace to think about other things.

It’s taken me a long time to be comfortable at work. At a place I like working at. That’s a big deal for me.

I gotta trust the process, and appreciate the small steps. So, this post is the best I can do.

Long term, I’ll have to schedule breaks in the future.

Thank you for continuing to support the blog!

Correction: I’m taking a 3 week break

I feel I posted the last post too soon, and I over reacted. I don’t want to be impulsive like that, so I feel this is a reasonable compromise.

I do need a long break, but not like this. Therapy will help. A longer break to allow me to focus on improving my personal life is just what I need.

I need to reconnect with offline life, family, friends, and myself.

Thanks for understanding.

I feel like quitting blogging

Grim, huh? But the Truth.

This has been something bothering me for a long time. But after reading this post by Renard’s World (and a few related linked posts at the end)…

It’s clear that I don’t love blogging. I do love interacting with fellow bloggers in the comments, but that’s about it. I guess I started the blog as a way to express myself and connect with others in the world, and to find out if I was any good at this. I was hoping to finally be good at something. I’ve kinda achieved those.

I don’t know why I do this, or why anyone would want to read this blog.

I don’t see what benefit improving anything would change.

If I’m being honest, I don’t love myself. I’m burned out on life. Having multiple mental illnesses doesn’t help. Not being able to trust others doesn’t help. I just kinda exist for the sake of it. So, I guess I need a bunch of further time in therapy to change myself. Having regular therapy helped me last year in being consistent.

I don’t know what I want from life. I wish that “nothing” was an acceptable answer. All I know is that blogging isn’t fulfilling or helpful to me for now.

EDIT: This was a bit rash, and too much. I’m going to take a three week break instead of indefinite.

You can always reach me by email or in the comments. The blog email is in the “Contact” page. Thank you for reading.